"Endings are foretold in beginnings, young human," Moriana said, "and the seeds of destruction are sown at creation." The dragoness smiled, a toothy sight. "But if you're fortunate, you're able to come around again to start anew."
"Is it always the same, honored Moriana?" I asked, my child's voice not yet broken by adolescence. I hopped from dragon print to dragon print, pressed deep in the leaf mold. "The same ending and beginning?"
"For some," the dragoness admitted. "But for others, it is the spiraling song of the lark ascending."
-- Covenants, by Lorna Freeman
Sunday, August 24, 2008
Saturday, August 9, 2008
Meeting the Green Master
In my last spirit journey, after the interlude with the jellyfish, I walked on up my path. As usual, the woods seemed dark, the trees were tall, black, and clean-limbed. As I walked, I practiced the exercises to open my heart, to try and accept more freely. As I did so, the sun broke through the trees and the woods lightened up. I stopped to look around, and it went dark again. Whenever I concentrated and opened my heart, the sun showed through the trees and they appeared green and bright; whenever I stopped, it went dark again. I have a lot of work to do, to learn to keep my heart open.
When I reached the clearing, my guides were there (Oak, Spider, and Swallow). I greeted them and thanked them all for their help. I looked to the stream, and the Green Master was there. He/she is a guide who usually appears in an anthropomorhic form, of a person crowned with leaves and growing with leaves. He usually works invisibly, under the surface. This is only the second time that I have spoked to him face to face.
We talked about my wife Athena, who has been having a rough time recently. He told me that I need to take care of her, she needs my help. He said that she has special gifts that she gives to me, just be being who she is; just as I bring her special gifts just by being with her. She doesn't know the gifts she brings me, and would deny it if asked; but it is true. If I feel inadequate, or if I don't know what to do or say for her, to not get upset. Sometimes just being there and doing what I can is all thats needed. Keep focused on my love for her and my respect and admiration, and I will do what is needed at the right time.
I took comfort from this, and thanked the Green Master and my other guides. I walked back down to the beach, and woke with a sense of peace and refreshed strength.
When I reached the clearing, my guides were there (Oak, Spider, and Swallow). I greeted them and thanked them all for their help. I looked to the stream, and the Green Master was there. He/she is a guide who usually appears in an anthropomorhic form, of a person crowned with leaves and growing with leaves. He usually works invisibly, under the surface. This is only the second time that I have spoked to him face to face.
We talked about my wife Athena, who has been having a rough time recently. He told me that I need to take care of her, she needs my help. He said that she has special gifts that she gives to me, just be being who she is; just as I bring her special gifts just by being with her. She doesn't know the gifts she brings me, and would deny it if asked; but it is true. If I feel inadequate, or if I don't know what to do or say for her, to not get upset. Sometimes just being there and doing what I can is all thats needed. Keep focused on my love for her and my respect and admiration, and I will do what is needed at the right time.
I took comfort from this, and thanked the Green Master and my other guides. I walked back down to the beach, and woke with a sense of peace and refreshed strength.
Monday, July 21, 2008
Wisdom from the Jellyfish
Last week, when walking, I was thinking of my guides and thanking those who helped me with Athena's bug bites. I thought of the Green Master, the human-appearing spirit being who appeared in my first journey. He/She said at the time that I may not see him much, he would be working behind the scenes to nurture and guide. So I thought, as I often do, "Well, if he needs me to contact him he will let me know." When all of sudden I just knew that he wanted to talk with me about something. It wasn't urgent, but that I should try and find time in the next few weeks for a spirit journey.
As usual, I started at the seashore, on the beach studded with shells and seagrass. I could see the beginning of the path up into the forest. But first I turned to the sea, and spoke to it wordlessly, trying to comprehend its vastness and majesty. I became aware that swimming in the water near my feet were several cone jellies, a harmless type of jellyfish shaped vaguely like a torpedo or a swimming cucumber with rippling lines down its sides that luminesce in the dark. I reached out with my heart and greeted them. One of them spoke to me, and as I admired it, it invited me to join with it and swim in the limitless sea.
I didn't follow it it body, but accompanied it in spirit into the deep sea, sometimes watching it and it's fellows flow effortlessly in the water, sometimes seeming to be a cone jelly myself. With a transparent almost formless body that seems hardly different from the sea itself, with the sea always flowing within and through it, I felt that the jellies do not feel themselves to be solid beings who move through the water, but to be embodiments of the water. As if they are the sea itself dreaming a form for its thoughts.
I sometimes have a fear of the deep ocean, terrified of falling forever in the blackness, not knowing which way was up, nothing solid to grasp. How can these creatures bear to swim in this bottomless ocean, with no reference points? It spoke to me and comforted my fears. There is no down, there is no up. There is nothing we are falling towards, there is not place we are going to, and nothing we are fleeing. We simply ARE. Immersed in the sea, fed by the sea, made of the sea, what can we fear? What could we desire? Let go, just BE. The universe will sustain you, if you relax and let it happen. If you live in the moment, you cannot get lost. If you are not going anywhere, you don't have to worry about not getting there.
I released my fears, opened my heart, and relaxed. My frenzied thrashing stopped, and for a brief while I knew what it was to simply exist, floating the middle of the all-sustaining void, with no needs or fears. I will try and carry this peace and perspective with me into my life.
I thanked the jellies for the teaching, and returned to the beach. In a later post, I will tell about the rest of my journey, and my meeting with the Green Master.
I didn't follow it it body, but accompanied it in spirit into the deep sea, sometimes watching it and it's fellows flow effortlessly in the water, sometimes seeming to be a cone jelly myself. With a transparent almost formless body that seems hardly different from the sea itself, with the sea always flowing within and through it, I felt that the jellies do not feel themselves to be solid beings who move through the water, but to be embodiments of the water. As if they are the sea itself dreaming a form for its thoughts.
I sometimes have a fear of the deep ocean, terrified of falling forever in the blackness, not knowing which way was up, nothing solid to grasp. How can these creatures bear to swim in this bottomless ocean, with no reference points? It spoke to me and comforted my fears. There is no down, there is no up. There is nothing we are falling towards, there is not place we are going to, and nothing we are fleeing. We simply ARE. Immersed in the sea, fed by the sea, made of the sea, what can we fear? What could we desire? Let go, just BE. The universe will sustain you, if you relax and let it happen. If you live in the moment, you cannot get lost. If you are not going anywhere, you don't have to worry about not getting there.
I released my fears, opened my heart, and relaxed. My frenzied thrashing stopped, and for a brief while I knew what it was to simply exist, floating the middle of the all-sustaining void, with no needs or fears. I will try and carry this peace and perspective with me into my life.
I thanked the jellies for the teaching, and returned to the beach. In a later post, I will tell about the rest of my journey, and my meeting with the Green Master.
Healing the itchies
Well, its been a while since I posted. Life has a way of getting very complex! I am trying to get back on my path, and take some time again for personal growth
Last week, Athena got a very bad case of itchy bug bites, possibly chiggers. I got a few, but she got a lot and the itching was driving her crazy. She asked me to use Reiki to help. I gave it a try, and asked for help from Oak and Spider in getting the poison out of her. I felt them help; Oak seemed to have an affinity with the malady and was able to counter some of the irritation, and Spider cast her web to try and catch the poison and drag it out. I also set up a circular circuit of energy into her ankle and back out into my hand, where I could catch and hold it it briefly and then dispose of it. Athena reported an intense feeling of energy, and I just pulled as hard as I could. I felt a lot of bad energy come out, cold and tingly. She said that it felt much more comfortable, and it continued to improve over the next several days.
Last week, Athena got a very bad case of itchy bug bites, possibly chiggers. I got a few, but she got a lot and the itching was driving her crazy. She asked me to use Reiki to help. I gave it a try, and asked for help from Oak and Spider in getting the poison out of her. I felt them help; Oak seemed to have an affinity with the malady and was able to counter some of the irritation, and Spider cast her web to try and catch the poison and drag it out. I also set up a circular circuit of energy into her ankle and back out into my hand, where I could catch and hold it it briefly and then dispose of it. Athena reported an intense feeling of energy, and I just pulled as hard as I could. I felt a lot of bad energy come out, cold and tingly. She said that it felt much more comfortable, and it continued to improve over the next several days.
Friday, April 18, 2008
Melanomas - yuck
Athena's horse Hep has a lot of melanomas. They are common with grey horses; they are not like human melanomas. They are swollen hard lumps varying from dime- to quarter-sized. They proliferate across the skin, but generally don't invade organs. They are considered inoperable: if you remove them, they come back faster and bigger. Received wisdom is that they are largely harmless and there is nothing you can do about them. Hep's are all over his rear and sheath, and almost certainly up into his colon.
Athena has just started a new herbal supplement specifically for melanomas. She asked me to use Reiki to get a feel for how the melanomas have spread, and to encourage them to break up.
Hep was very jittery about letting energy into that area, and kept moving around -- his usual thing. He settled some after a minute and I concentrated on really soaking the energy into and around the melanomas. After a few minutes, I really made contact -- I could sense them all through is lower gut. As I poured energy into them and pushed at them, I could really feel them -- like big lumps all over my arms. I didn't let them move up past my forearms, but just used the opening to really hit them with energy and told them to break up. I also asked Hep to tell them to go away and reject them. In a moment I felt a huge wave of heat move through the area, and I think the melanomas responded. I don't expect them to just drop off, but hopefully they will start to gradually shrink.
When I felt them on my arms, I considered trying to 'draw' them out of Hep into myself where I could cast them away, something I have done in the past with aches and pains. But I could tell that they were much to strong for this, and that if I really pulled them into me I could be in danger. So I set firm limits on what I would allow into me, accepting the awareness of them but refusing any essense or tainted energy. Instead, I kept the focus of pushing healing energy out, and sending the melanomas away.
Time will tell if the supplements and/or the Reiki will help him. We will keep working!
Athena has just started a new herbal supplement specifically for melanomas. She asked me to use Reiki to get a feel for how the melanomas have spread, and to encourage them to break up.
Hep was very jittery about letting energy into that area, and kept moving around -- his usual thing. He settled some after a minute and I concentrated on really soaking the energy into and around the melanomas. After a few minutes, I really made contact -- I could sense them all through is lower gut. As I poured energy into them and pushed at them, I could really feel them -- like big lumps all over my arms. I didn't let them move up past my forearms, but just used the opening to really hit them with energy and told them to break up. I also asked Hep to tell them to go away and reject them. In a moment I felt a huge wave of heat move through the area, and I think the melanomas responded. I don't expect them to just drop off, but hopefully they will start to gradually shrink.
When I felt them on my arms, I considered trying to 'draw' them out of Hep into myself where I could cast them away, something I have done in the past with aches and pains. But I could tell that they were much to strong for this, and that if I really pulled them into me I could be in danger. So I set firm limits on what I would allow into me, accepting the awareness of them but refusing any essense or tainted energy. Instead, I kept the focus of pushing healing energy out, and sending the melanomas away.
Time will tell if the supplements and/or the Reiki will help him. We will keep working!
Thursday, April 17, 2008
Naiads of Eureka Springs
In Eureka Springs, Athena and spent a day walking to visit all the springs in the town. Many of them had been recently cleaned and relandscaped by the new city gardener (who is a genius and an artist; whatever they pay him it isn't enough!). But we also wanted to see some of the lesser-known springs. It delighted me how each spring has its own very distinct character and appearance, they were all quite different from each other.
Little Saucer Spring, at Little Lake Eureka. To get to this spring, we had to walk down a path past several "No Trespassing Private Property" signs. Local residents assured us that the spring was public, as was the path to it, but that the owner of the lake kept putting up signs trying to scare people away. He has even set up his own private party place at the spring, with tiki torches and a grill. Perhaps as a result of this, the spring did not feel welcoming (unlike all the other springs). The spirit there felt standoffish, masculine, and somewhat resentful of our presence. Also, the water from the spring is caught in Little Lake Eureka (more like a large pond). One of the delights of all the springs, streams, and other water in the Eureka Springs area is that it is so clear and pure looking, always sparkling and bright even after heavy rains. But the water of Little Lake Eureka was dark, sluggish, and full of algae; it felt hostile and sickly. I wasn't even tempted to touch the water. We left there quickly.
Some that stick in my mind:
Laundry Spring, so called because it was the place where all the residents did their laundry. It used to be called Onyx Spring, until tourists carried off all of the onyx :). This spring is a small cave carved into the rock, a rectangular door that lets you see into a still pool full of clear water. I reached out to see if the spring had a spirit, and was answered by a charming female spirit. She said that she used to be very busy, when this was a social center of the town and was always full of housewives gossiping and children playing. She enjoyed this, but she is happy now that she is just a quiet spring on a smaller road. It is quieter now, and she finds it more restful, but she still takes an interest in the people who live on the road and follows their lives. She was very friendly, quiet and centered, secure in herself. After asking permission, I dipped my fingers in her water and touched them to my lips, offering and accepting grace.
Laundry Spring, so called because it was the place where all the residents did their laundry. It used to be called Onyx Spring, until tourists carried off all of the onyx :). This spring is a small cave carved into the rock, a rectangular door that lets you see into a still pool full of clear water. I reached out to see if the spring had a spirit, and was answered by a charming female spirit. She said that she used to be very busy, when this was a social center of the town and was always full of housewives gossiping and children playing. She enjoyed this, but she is happy now that she is just a quiet spring on a smaller road. It is quieter now, and she finds it more restful, but she still takes an interest in the people who live on the road and follows their lives. She was very friendly, quiet and centered, secure in herself. After asking permission, I dipped my fingers in her water and touched them to my lips, offering and accepting grace.
Little Saucer Spring, at Little Lake Eureka. To get to this spring, we had to walk down a path past several "No Trespassing Private Property" signs. Local residents assured us that the spring was public, as was the path to it, but that the owner of the lake kept putting up signs trying to scare people away. He has even set up his own private party place at the spring, with tiki torches and a grill. Perhaps as a result of this, the spring did not feel welcoming (unlike all the other springs). The spirit there felt standoffish, masculine, and somewhat resentful of our presence. Also, the water from the spring is caught in Little Lake Eureka (more like a large pond). One of the delights of all the springs, streams, and other water in the Eureka Springs area is that it is so clear and pure looking, always sparkling and bright even after heavy rains. But the water of Little Lake Eureka was dark, sluggish, and full of algae; it felt hostile and sickly. I wasn't even tempted to touch the water. We left there quickly.
Magnetic Spring. This is on the side of the road a short way out from town. It used to be the main entrance to Eureka Springs, and was the first spring that travelers encountered, and was a major attraction. It is credited with many of the early healings. The road now is more like the back entrance, used only by people going to see the Passion Play; there is a nice pavilion next to it where groups can stop. The spirit here felt very masculine and boisterous. He was happy and welcoming. He said that he used to get a lot of traffic, and enjoyed the activity and the electricity of having so many excited people around. Although it is quieter now, he says that he still gets a charge from all the religious people that go by, and that he enjoys being part of it all. He was happy to have me touch his water, and that it was a pleasure to share his blessings with anyone who wished.
Thursday, March 27, 2008
Walking Meditation
One of the exercises that Athena and I did on our vacation was walking meditation. I had never done this before, and I feel like I got a lot out of it. Basically, we walked slowly through the garden and back yard; placing our feet slowly (a la Tai Chi, maintaining our balance while slowly lifting and placing the feet, by conciously shifting weight to the supporting foot). The objective was to be totally aware of the experience of walking: savoring the sensations of different types of surfaces, aware of our bodies and how they moved, and being conciously grounded and aware of how the earth supports us.
I found that focusing on being grounded and connected to the earth while I walked disoriented me, and made me loose balance :) So instead, I focused on my balance and how the earth supported me at all times. This was very steadying.
While I was walking, I deliberately chose different surfaces (concrete, flagstone, gravel, dirt, grass, gravel, etc). I tried to feel every nuance, and not to avoid or reject uncomfortable (even slightly painful) sensations. As I did this, trying to accept and learn from everything that the earth had to offer, I got a strange feeling: that the sensations I felt as I walked were the voice of the earth, speaking to the soles of my feet. Not in words, but it was like the changing interplay of hard/soft/sharp/round was like listening to the voice of a loving parent, when you can't understand the words but can only follow the music of their voice. And I thought, "How toneless and dull this voice would sound, if there were no highs and lows! If there were no sharp consonants to punctuate the rolling vowels, it would not be half so lovely to hear. I am so happy to feel the rich, varied voice of the earth!"
I found that focusing on being grounded and connected to the earth while I walked disoriented me, and made me loose balance :) So instead, I focused on my balance and how the earth supported me at all times. This was very steadying.
While I was walking, I deliberately chose different surfaces (concrete, flagstone, gravel, dirt, grass, gravel, etc). I tried to feel every nuance, and not to avoid or reject uncomfortable (even slightly painful) sensations. As I did this, trying to accept and learn from everything that the earth had to offer, I got a strange feeling: that the sensations I felt as I walked were the voice of the earth, speaking to the soles of my feet. Not in words, but it was like the changing interplay of hard/soft/sharp/round was like listening to the voice of a loving parent, when you can't understand the words but can only follow the music of their voice. And I thought, "How toneless and dull this voice would sound, if there were no highs and lows! If there were no sharp consonants to punctuate the rolling vowels, it would not be half so lovely to hear. I am so happy to feel the rich, varied voice of the earth!"
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)